The Happy Carpenter

The Latest on Paula

OK, she's still in Germany. She'll be coming back to the USA on Sunday. She's going to be at Walter Reed hospital for a few days at least. And best of all, the radial nerve in her right arm was NOT severed. And that's great news.

My Mom

I thought you, gentle blogger, might get a kick out of this little exchange between me, my Mom, my sister, and some of her Lefty friends (indirectly). And by all means go and read the article at The Progressive (sic). I actually found it instructive. I'm going to cut & paste to put this in chronological order. Here goes....

The email that started it all from my sister to my mother:
From: Patricia
To: MOM (E-mail) ; Peter (E-mail)
Cc: Lewis
Sent: Thursday, October 30, 2003 4:03 PM
Subject: FW: This is from The Progressive

Small Favors Molly Ivins

Call Me a Bush-Hater
http://www.progressive.org/nov03/ivin1103.html

Then my Mom responds. She's a spunky one, my Mom.
----- Original Message -----
From: Mary
To: Trish
Cc: Peter ; lewis
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2003 11:21 AM
Subject: Re: This is from The Progressive

LET ME GUESS--THIS IS FROM CAROLE!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE NOT HAD TIME TO READ IT ALL YET, BUT I JUST ABOUT FLIPPED! IF YOU WERE GOING TO BALANCE YOUR GOOD INTELLIGENT THINKING WITH WHAT THE REALLY FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR LEFT WHACKOS WERE THINKING. YOU WOULD GO TO THE FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR LEFT, YOU WOULD GO TO THE PROGRESSIVE AND THE MOST FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR OUT WOULD BE WRITTEN BY MOLLY. UNBELIEVABLE! BOY, DOES IT DISTORT AND LIE. BUT I AM NOT RANTING!!!!!!!! WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE ARTICLE, I ASK IN A CALM VOICE, AND DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS?????????????
LOVE,
MOMGOOSE

And then my reply to my Mom
----- Original Message -----
From: Peter
To: Mary
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2003 11:31 AM
Subject: Re: This is from The Progressive

Dear MOM,
In polite cyber society, one never uses all caps. To use all caps is to shout, and to hold down kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkeys is to have spittle fly out of your mouth while you shout. You most definitely are ranting, dear.
Keep it up ;-)

Mr Multitalented, that's me

Download file
click it. It's a lost art.

Am I too old to be a "South Park Republican"?

I guess this is what think tanks do. Here's a link to a loooooooong article about changes in the media -- how it's shifting tothe right, by Brian C Anderson of City Journal.
A few clips:
The “fair and balanced” approach that Fox trumpets in its slogan is part of this iconoclastic tone, too. Sure, the anchor is almost always a conservative, but it’s clear he is striving to tell the truth, and there’s always a liberal on hand, too. By contrast, political consultant and Fox contributor Dick Morris notes, “The other networks offer just one point of view, which they claim is objective.” Not only does the Fox approach make clear that there is always more than one point of view, but it also puts the network’s liberal guests in the position of having to defend their views—something that almost never happens on other networks.
And here's another:
Many conservatives have attacked South Park for its exuberant vulgarity, calling it “twisted,” “vile trash,” a “threat to our youth.” Such denunciations are misguided. Conservative critics should pay closer attention to what South Park so irreverently jeers at and mocks. As the show’s co-creator, 32-year-old Matt Stone, sums it up: “I hate conservatives, but I really f***ing hate liberals.”
And prepare to laugh:
The show’s single black kid is called Token. One episode, “Cripple Fight,” concludes with a slugfest between the boys’ wheelchair-bound, cerebral-palsy-stricken friend Timmy and the obnoxious Jimmy, who wants to be South Park’s Number One “handi-capable” citizen (in his cringe-making PC locution). In another, “Rainforest Schmainforest,” the boys’ school sends them on a field trip to Costa Rica, led by an activist choir group, “Getting Gay with Kids,” which wants to raise youth awareness about “our vanishing rain forests.” Shown San José, Costa Rica’s capital, the boys are unimpressed:

Cartman [holding his nose]: Oh my God, it smells like ass out here!
Choir teacher: All right, that does it! Eric Cartman, you respect other cultures this instant.
Cartman: I wasn’t saying anything about their culture, I was just saying their city smells like ass.

But if the city is unpleasant, the rain forest itself is a nightmare: the boys get lost, wilt from the infernal heat, face deadly assaults from monstrous insects and a giant snake, run afoul of revolutionary banditos, and—worst of all—must endure the choir teacher’s New-Agey gushing: “Shhh! Children! Let’s try to listen to what the rain forest tells us, and if we use our ears, she can tell us so many things.” By the horrifying trip’s end, the boys are desperate for civilization, and the choir teacher herself has come to despise the rain forest she once worshiped: “You go right ahead and plow down this whole f***in’ thing,” she tells a construction worker.

The episode concludes with the choir’s new song:

Doo doo doo doo doo. Doo doo doo wa.
There’s a place called the rain forest that truly sucks ass.
Let’s knock it all down and get rid of it fast.
You say “save the rain forest” but what do you know?
You’ve never been there before.
Getting Gay with Kids is here
To tell you things you might not like to hear.
You only fight these causes ‘cause caring sells.
All you activists can go f*** yourselves.
As the disclaimer before each episode states, the show is so offensive “it should not be viewed by anyone.”

Well. Oh my. I'm going to have to try watching South Park again. I tied once, but couldn't understand a word they said. Does any body know if there's a subtitled version available?

When Rage at the Ex meets greed for tools, anything can happen

Check this out. Hilarious and I guess actual eBay auction. Click here to see.

A Scurrilous Hit Piece

Or should I say, a Swing and a Miss piece? Today’s St. Petersburg Times tried to keep up the smear on Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld with an article headlined “Rumsfeld’s attitude may be his downfall”. Then the article goes on to try to make some point against him, a point which will elude the reader no matter how many times he tries. The idea of trying to use a memo calling for renewed self-examination as proof of failure is astounding. Others have commented on the stupidity of that particular anti-Rumsfeld crowd. I wanted to share the results of Pravda’s little poll: Should Donald Rumsfeld be replaced as defense secretary? As of 4:30 today, 76% said NO! You know that’s just gotta stick in their craw sideways. Heh heh heh.

Why Paula is a hero

My eight year old (actually 7-11.5/12's) daughter Rochelle asked me why Paula was a hero? I told her... it's not because she was wounded. Injuries can happen to anybody. Paula is a hero because she dared to be there, in Bahgdad, in the nexus of danger, where she could help the downtrodden and the oppressed. Paula didn't tell anyone she was going to Iraq until 2 or 3 days before she left. Some of us think that's because she didn't want her family to try to talk her out of it. I think it's because she was bashful about her do-gooder-ness, and her bravery. It doesn't matter that her motivations were multifaceted and complicated -- like the President's decision to go to war in the first place. It was the right thing to do, it needed doing, and she tried to do it. And DAMN she got all blowed up her first week. Sheeee-IT! And CRAP does that hurt. And it will be a long time before she sticks her head up out of the metaphorical foxhole again.
But she is not just any hero. She's my hero.
And the funny thing is, we never saw eye to eye on politics. Paula is a bit of lefty, from my side. No doubt she'd claim the title "moderate", but as any right thinking person knows, any one to the left of my moderation is Left. Anyway, that's not what's important. She answered The Call. I wish she'd had more time to get to know the people of Iraq, but that was not to be. She's coming home, and that's what ultimately matters most.
Proud as a peacock,
OUT.

She's in Germany!

I just talked to her, and Dee Dee is talking to her even as I speak! She's in Germany, recovering from her 2nd operation. Something about the kind of mortar round she was hit by, and having to remove the dead flesh. YUCK. That's more than I needed to know -- I'm not the medical type. She was pretty groggy from the med's, but she's one step closer to home. It's great hearing her talking to Dee Dee on the phone. It sounds to me like a normal sister to sister conversation, Wikle style. Paula is a little ticked about her new-found fame, and a little embarrassed. Dee Dee is not sorry at all, thinks her little sister deserves a little credit and a big homecoming party.
Count on it, Paula!!!

They're starting to catch on...

Here's a funny link showing that the lefties, or at least the left-leaning youngsters, are beginning to notice what's happening. Thanks to Andrew Sullivan, I am happy to present this excerpt from Newtopia, a Punk Rock credo site, whatever that is:

Newtopia: As a resident of Los Angeles, how do you feel about the California recall election?

Mat: F--- yeah. It is funny how the spin doctors tried to make what was democracy in action seem reactionary because it did not conform to their narrow ideals. Too many Democrats are shrill, hopeless, undersexed squares. It will be funny if the Republicans are hip all of a sudden and the left is suddenly me, you and our high school English teachers lecturing about the triumph of the 60s. That is what is happening here, the Republicans are hijacking culture. And the Democrats are a bunch of squares in suits saying tsk-tsk-tsk. It is funny. I lost any hope in politics after what Clinton did to Jerry Brown in the 1992 primaries. The first issue of Coagula was a pamphleteering plea to elect Jerry Brown. Clinton was a hopeless square and now that is coming home to roost. The true intellects and creative forces in the Democratic party have been marginalized in favor of Centrist conformists, and now the Republicans are saying "Hey let's party!" and the true strengths of the Democrats are seen as fringe, risky strategies by the Democratic leaders, and the Republicans seem like visionaries, but a monkey in a fez would seem like a leader and visionary standing next to Bustamante or Davis!

Click here if you want to read the whole thing. I've been saying since 1994 that most of the interesting debate in politics is between the conservative and the libertarian wings of the Republican party. I predicted 10 years ago that some day the Democrat Party would go the way of the Wigs (Whigs?) and the Republican Party would bifurcate. And I think that's exactly what is happening. I hate to be another one of those pundits who use CaliFORNia to prove their pet theory, but tell me that Arnold/Cruz?Grey/McClintock don't fit right into this theory of mine! Next year the Democrats will conspicuously crumble, and it will be hard for even the most diehard lefty to deny the numerical decline - in terms of offices held - of their party. There won't be much to see on the Republican side given the President's stature, but 2008 will be interesting on the Right. And by 2010 the Democrats will be more or less irrelevant. IMHO.

Iraq Rocket Attack Pinned Pinellas Woman

So says the headline in today's St. Petersburg Times in the article scanned above. (Sorry about the scan, but I couldn't find it in Pravda's , err, I mean the St. Pete Tiimes' site today. It's the same story all over again, although the Times is the first of the many press reports to get a lot of the facts wrong, and to make many assumptions out of thin air.
First and most important: Paula's arm was not severed. Paula thought so, at first, when she was in shock. Fortunately she turned out to be wrong. And Dee Dee did not tell the reporter that Paula's arm was severed. Sheesh.
Second, Paula didn't hear prayers. She heard bells. I guess prayers make a better story, but that's not what she heard.
Third, maybe it was the ceiling that crashed on her, or maybe the wall, or maybe the window, or all three. Or something else. Paula doesn't know, we don't know, and neither does the St Pete Times.
Well, hopefully we're all done with the 4th Estate for now. All in al, I was impressed with the earnestness of the TV folks, their eagerness and ability to get the facts straight. They did have a little trouble pronouncing Paula's last name -- WIKLE -- that's Why-kull, not will-key and definately not wick-lee. But that's nothing new.