--You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
--You have more than 300 "C" and "D" batteries in your kitchen drawer.
--Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti-O's.
--You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood covering your windows.
--When describing your house, you say it has three bedrooms, two baths and a safe hallway.
--Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on your arm.
--You are on a first name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.
--You are delighted to pay $3.00 for a gallon of regular unleaded.
--The road leading to your house has been declared a "No-Wake Zone."
--You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom of the pool.
--You catch a 13 pound red-fish...in your driveway.
--You can recite from memory portions of your homeowner's insurance policy.
--You consider a "vacation" to stunning Tupelo, Mississippi.
--At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy with the biggest chain-saw.
--You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
--There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.
--You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists on the Weather Channel.
--Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.
--Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
--Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a crazy idea.
--You spend more time on your roof then in your living room.
--You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder or a tree worker.
--A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.
--You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit during the summer.
--Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's Christmas.
--You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and the "bad side."
--Your kids start school in August and finish in July.
--You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air conditioning.
--You own more than three large coolers.
--You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled with water in your freezer.
--Your child's first words are "hunker down" and you didn't go to Ole Miss!
--Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain...today you can assemble a portable generator by candlelight.